Monday, April 14, 2008

From My Perspective

So here's the scenario. You've decided to square off with me over some trivial issue. We might be at the door and I've refused you entry, or I'm inside and asking you to leave. Either way, you and I aren't on the same page, and you've let me know, in no uncertain terms, that you're dissatisfied. You're so dissatisfied with me that you've made it clear that you'd like to hurt me over this perceived downtown barscene slight.

And that's where we find ourselves. You want inside and you can't get in, or you don't want to leave and you've turned to face me and are considering showing your anger to me through physical violence.

And what's going through my head immediately before you decide to take the first swing, or simply turn around and walk away is this:

I'm watching your hands. Are they in your pockets? Is there a weapon in there? A knife? Are your fists balled up, ready to swing? I'm watching your shoulders for that first move, usually a big, wild right haymaker. I'm looking at your face, your pupils, to try and see if you're on something more than alcohol. I'm looking at your ears, to see if you've got the infamous "cauliflower ear", which isn't uncommon in wrestlers and fighters. I'm watching the people behind you who could possibly be your friends, ready to jump in as soon as things start going down. I'm watching my peripherial vision for my friends, ready to come and help me. I'm looking at my surroundings.

If I'm outside, then all I need to do is create some space between us if things start happening. If it really gets out of control, then I'll try to get behind you and choke you and just wait for help to get there. If we're inside, then not only do I have to get the upper hand, then I've got to drag you out to the front door. In some ways, it's much easier at the door.

Most importantly, I'm evaluating and trying to determine how badly, if at all, you're capable of hurting me should you decide to escalate the situation that you've created into physical violence.

But most of all, I'm simply hoping you'll just turn and walk away because it gets fucking old after awhile. If you find yourself on the receiving end of one of these encounters with a bar employee, just turn around and go the fuck away. Don't try to go out with dignity or save any face, because while I might take your shit on the way out, there are plenty of other bars downtown that won't, and you'll quickly find yourself drug into the back alley or parking lot for some personal one-on-three time simply because you can't bring yourself to back down. There's 30 other bars downtown that you can go be a jackass in besides this one.

I guarantee this scene repeats itself night after night downtown. And personally, I'm pretty sick of it.


At 7:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just so you know I love reading your blog. I'm a female student who gets just as aggravated at drunk asshole guys as you do. Unlike some of the girls down here I don't enjoy getting harassed when I'm just out to see some friends. Thank you for doing your job and kicking guys like that out of places so girls like me can go have a drink in peace.

At 4:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

A few more reasons not to verbally/physically abuse a bar employee...

1) There are more of them than you think...because you watch Ultimate Fighting you may think you can take the bartender/ bouncer one on one, so you make your move. But you don't see the that other bartender or barback who is leaping across the bar or that second bouncer behind you and they are ready to make sure you must be dragged out. Also, many people/friends love to help the staff. They may get even a complimentary shot or beer out it.

2) You are not the first one...Odds are you are not the first person to try something stupid. Through countless experiences or formal training, bar staff know how to remove someone from their bar swiftly and effectively. Force may be deemed necessary.

3) You've been drinking and they haven't...This is most important one. I would dare say that even before one of the newest ordinances, prohibiting bar employees from drinking, was passed most bar employees remained sober. The alcohol has most likely slowed your reflexs. This gives the staff another obvious advantage.

Like you said earlier, the bouncer is always studying you and if you are face to face with a bouncer then there is at least one bartender/barback studying you too. Confrontation against the bouncer only pisses him off, and if he lets you walk out consider yourself lucky.


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