A Great Piece of Advice

In the event that you are ejected from a bar or club, threatening the bouncers from the safety of the sidewalk is highly discouraged. If you can't say it to us while you were inside the club, then you probably are too much of a pussy to say it at all.

In addition, announcing your status as a member of the U.S. Army, or - in a recent case last weekend - a "Jujitsu master", will not intimidate those of us who just manhandled you out of the door while you pled for forgiveness.

Also, pushing those around you who were simply walking by and in no way involved with said confrontation is looked down upon by us. Pushing around kids who aren't even paying attention doesn't impress us nor does it strike fear into our hearts, as I'm sure you were hoping it would.

Finally, taking off ones shirt is also discouraged. This is especially true when you are significantly smaller than those who just made you their bitch while dragging you out.

This concludes todays advice for getting thrown out of a bar and/or club.