Not Me!

"Yo, you know I didn't do nothin'. You know, dawg!" said the thug wannabe, as I walked him to the door, ending his night much earlier than I'm sure he had anticipated.

"Well then I'm sure you know that I really don't care." I responded.

"Man...that's some bullshit!" He stopped near the front door and turned to face me.

"Dude...keep moving and we'll talk about it outside, alright?"

He looked at me for a moment and then shrugged his shoulders.

"Whateva, play'a"

I rolled my eyes at the guys at the door when he walked out. I'm sure they had overheard that.

This guy, I mouthed, pointing at the thug wannabe while simultaneously doing the universal door guy cut-throat motion with my other hand, meaning that he had been kicked out for the night.

I immediately turned around and walked back inside the second he was safely on the sidewalk.

"Hey!!! You were supposed to talk to me!" I heard the thug yelling at me from the sidewalk as I disappeared back inside.

Yea, yea. I was supposed to talk to him, but I didn't want to. He threatened another guy on the floor, which means we had absolutely nothing to talk about. It's just a line to get a shithead out the door without dragging him out, and he fell for it.

And yea...I might be a dick for tossing a guy out under the pretense that I would have a conversation about his subsequent dismissal from the bar for the night once he was outside, and then not doing it and leaving the guys at the door to deal with him, but I had already talked him out the door.

But I knew he wasn't a threat to myself, or especially the guys at the door. Trust me.

What really gets to me about this entire situation is the fact that nobody can fucking own up to what they did or stay on the subject at hand. Working in a bar has shown me that time and time again.

He "didn't do nothin'". Well yea...ya actually did, you piece of shit. You threatened to fuck up another floor guy for calling his friend on his rowdy behavior. Then, when you noticed the guy you were threatening was an employee, all of the sudden you weren't so aggressive anymore. But alas, it was too late for you. Your night was over.

In my book, a dude going around threatening people will eventually get called on his shit and get in a fight. And that, my friends, is where it eventually would become my problem. And my aim was to prevent that from happening.

So yes, young little gangster wannabe - you did do something.

And that applies everywhere. But I'm 21! doesn't negate the fact that you're so hammered you can't stand up. The matter at hand is your level of intoxication, not your age. So shut it.

The same goes for dress code. That sure is wonderful that your friends are inside, but I didn't seem to notice that quad-XL shirt you're wearing getting any smaller, did you?

And yes, little honest angel. You may indeed be the DD and have been upfront with the fact you're underage, but that doesn't make you any older in my eyes. Yes, yes. I hear you. You still have to be 21+ to enter...even if you're not drinking. Oh, what's that you say? You promise you're not drinking? Hmmm...let me think about it. No. You're not 21. You can't go in. The issue is your age and you keep changing subjects.

And dude, I saw you push that girl last week. I fucking saw you. Remember immediately afterwards when I got in your face and you were too much of a pussy to push me like you pushed her? And you were such a pussy that you wouldn't even own up to what I had just seen with my own eyes?

So no, it's not bullshit that you can't come in, and yes, you're still banned. Quit trying to come inside because eventually your skinny little ass is gonna find me on a night when I'm drinking and pissed off and I'm going to jump up and down on your head. At least own up to your own actions, if nothing else.

So please....PLEASE....own up to your actions and stay on subject, for Gods sake.