Last night was a typical night. I worked the door for the entire night checking IDs or helping the other guy who was checking IDs. Most times on weekend nights (this was a slower night however) we staff more than one person at the door. This helps alleviate the stress of lots of drunk college kids trying to cram their pathetic excuse of a fake ID in your face.
I reject a significant number of fake and/or altered IDs. For the most part we don't take them up, unless I'm in a bad mood or I've been drinking...or both. I consider the place I work at to be pretty tough on bad IDs, but being in a town where the general attitude is extremely lax about IDs in the first place, we probably pale in comparison to other cities standards. Thus, this creates an atmosphere where there are tons of underage kids out drinking and when they get rejected, it's a surprise to them. They're just not used to it, and they're drunk so they want to run their mouths. This is partially why one drunk, underaged and privledged frat boy ended up tossed onto the sidewalk after repeatedly calling the other guy checking IDs names for rejected his horribly outdated fake ID that wasn't him.
The first girl I rejected for a pretty bad fake immediately fessed up that she wasn't 21 and it was "only a month until she turned 21" and she "really really wanted to go inside so could she give me a hug and then go inside if she really didn't drink much?"
"OHHHHHHHHH, I was under the impression that you really weren't THAT interested in going inside. Now that I know that you really want to go inside...SURE. In fact, bring all your other underaged friends, as long as they really want to go inside and party. I mean, they DO pay me to check IDs and spot fakes, but I can always make an exception for the people who are serious about going inside."
This brought the usual "but I was just in here last night" and "I know so and so!" and "I promise I won't drink much!" etc. etc. We were unimpressed and ignored her at that point.
When she realized she wasn't getting in, she sat near the door with a pouty face on while the rest of us just laughed at her. Funny.
A lot of people try and say that some guys who work the door at a club or bar are huge assholes. They're 100% right. Anyone who works a door for a significant amount of time has heard it all before. Customers use the same excuses for why they should be allowed in, regardless of their lack of a real ID, the fact that the doors closed 20 minutes ago, or they're out of dress code or whatever. So we get sick of hearing the same tired old excuses and the same tired old attitudes night after night for us simply doing our job. Thus, a jaded door guy is born and we try to entertain ourselves by giving a witty reply, or just generally trying to humiliate someone so we can get our kicks, if for no other reason.
Another girl I rejected told me it was cool that I got my kicks out of rejecting people. I was obviously on a power trip and I ruined her friends night. I told her I wouldn't lose any sleep over it and to come back when her friend turned 21 so I could find another reason to reject her then. I'm not exactly sure how underaged kids decide its my fault for them being under 21 and spotting their fake. As if I went out of their way to invite them down here only to deny them entry.
A drunk thug wanna-be spent a majority of the night in the middle of the multi-laned road in front of the bar talking on his cell phone. We eventually started a pool to bet at what time he would get hit by a car. Sadly, it never happened.
A couple of other kids were escorted out for trying to steal liquor at the end of the night. One thing I've learned about drunks is that they will steal anything that's not practically nailed down. Several years ago I had a kid find his way to the overstock closet where a fridge is kept stocked full of beer in case behind the bar runs out. He helped himself to every beer he could stuff in his cargo pants and topped that off with a CO2 tank which weighs about 30 pounds. Somehow he got past the guy working the door when I spotted him from the back of the bar walking out with all that stuff. We caught him down the sidewalk and took our stuff back. But seriously, what in the fuck would anyone do with a CO2 tank? It's stealing just to steal! It's fucking ridiculous.
Anyhow, I'm rambling, but all of that happened just last night, which was actually sort of a slow night. Good times.