Friday, November 03, 2006

This was a funny one

Working the door at any establishment that sells alcohol leaves you open to a lot of interesting, funny, unbelievable, and at times, scary, situations. This is especially true if the establishment you work at has rules about who can and can't come in in terms of dress code, capacity of the bar, their policy on fake/altered IDs etc. etc. Thus, whoever is working the door can be the subject of some rude or just downright mean people when rejecting someone.

If I had a dime for every time I was called a name at the door, to say I'd be a rich man would be an understatement. This time was particularly funny because I managed to get someone to call me an asshole without even saying a single word. It was great.

A couple walk up to me while I'm at the door. The guy is thugged out in jeans that have to be held up by some magical force because the wasteline of his jeans are somewhere around his knees. Topped off with a 3000XXXL huge white t-shirt, crooked hat, do-rag, bling (no doubt real) and a grill he looks like he walked straight out of a gangster rap video. His girlfriend is no better.

"Dude, listen dog, I lost mah homie and I think he might be in yo club. He's wearin' this fly blue...."

I look at the guy silently and wonder how many hours a day he spends watching BET. He obviously picks up on this.

".....MAAAAN, you bouncers round here are ASSHOLES. I was just ova at tha (insert bar name) and they wouldn't let me in cause I ain't got no collared shirt on. That's some BULLSHIT. Why you givin me this attitude, dawg??"

"I haven't said a word to you."

"But I know what you goin ta say, you ain't gonna let me in..."

"That's right."

" ALL assholes around here. We ain't even from this town and we get treated like shit."

"Have a great night."

They walked away pissed off. I mean seriously....does anyone who dresses like that actually expect to be taken seriously? Unbelievable.


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