No Exceptions

"Why can't I just go in?" she asked me for what seemed like the tenth time, giving me puppy dog eyes and trying her best to look sad.

"Because it's almost 2:30, and we closed the doors thirty minutes ago. Sorry." I said, hoping she would finally give up and go away.

"But my friends are in there! And look, the door is open" she protested, pointing towards the propped open doors.

"Well, maybe you should have gotten here a little earlier." I said, repeating myself for what seemed like the tenth time.

"Besides, it's not my policy," I went on, trying to explain myself a little more. "It's the policy of the guy who signs my paychecks. There are cameras everywhere, and if I let you in then I'll get in trouble. And when I said 'the doors are closed' I mean that we're not letting anyone else in for the night, not that they're technically closed."

She sighed in annoyance and looked around, desperately trying to think of a way inside.

"Can't I just come in?" she whined. I shook my head.

"You're not listening to me! Please? Look," she said, brushing back her hair and showing me a small hearing aid propped above her left ear. "I have a hearing aid. Please can I go in and find my friends?"

I motioned for her to lean in towards me as I positioned myself about 6 inches from her. Her face lit up and she came closer.

"I'm going to make this as clear as I can..." I paused for dramatic effect. "No. If you can't understand that, then I suggest going to change the batteries in that damn thing on your ear. Now go away."

She scowled at me and backed away to spend the next 15 minutes glaring at me from across the sidewalk until her friends came out.

"Asshole!" she screamed at me as she finally left.

Yes....yes I am.